Not interesting.

I still have my work

Some people just aren’t destined to be happy. Their lives are dedicated to a higher purpose.

I need to learn to accept this.

i’ve decided why i’m unhappy.

i have a clear picture of the person that i want to be, and i am i am unhappy when i am not progressing toward that picture. i am especially unhappy when there are reasons where i think i will never be that picture.

1. i want to have lots of people i can always hang out with. i hate feeling alone.
2. i want to be good looking instead of ugly and fat.
3. i don’t want 2011 to be the last year ever, that somebody new sees me naked. i don’t give a single shit what society says about it, that’s fucked up to the core.
4. i want to travel all over, have awesome hobbies, and have things to talk about other than computer crap.
5. i want to go out at 11pm, stay out all night, then have awesome stories of the crazy shit we did while drunk/high/sober/whatever. i don’t want my life to be an endless progression of ‘yeah, we watched a movie and stayed inside.’
6. everyone thinks that i’m just another straight person, and i hate that.

from now on, i’m going to do what makes me happy. if that means that she can’t live with me or ends up hating me, then she should leave me even though I’ll hate it, so that she can find someone else that will make her happy.

the only person i’m going to be is the one i want to be. full stop.

i know that she can fit into my life and that we can be happy together, but at the end of the day, i get another 20-30 years and then i’m fucking done. no do-overs.

after that, i sit in a chair in an old folks home remembering my life - is it going to be a life of regret, or is it going to be a complete life well lived?

i’m not going to live a compromise. life is either a daring adventure, or nothing.

you’re flawed if you aren’t free

I like your twisted point of view, Mike
I like your questioning eyebrows
You’ve made it pretty clear what you like
It’s only fair to tell you now

that I leave early in the morning
and I won’t be back till next year
I see that kiss-me pucker forming
but maybe you should plug it with a beer, cause

Papa was a rodeo - Mama was a rock’n’roll band
I could play guitar and rope a steer before I learned to stand
Home was anywhere with diesel gas - Love was a trucker’s hand
Never stuck around long enough for a one night stand
Before you kiss me you should know
Papa was a rodeo

The light reflecting off the mirror ball
looks like a thousand swirling eyes
They make me think I shouldn’t be here at all
You know, every minute someone dies

What are we doing in this dive bar
How can you live in a place like this
Why don’t you just get into my car
and I’ll take you away I’ll take that kiss now, but

Papa was a rodeo - Mama was a rock’n’roll band
I could play guitar and rope a steer before I learned to stand
Home was anywhere with diesel gas - Love was a trucker’s hand
Never stuck around long enough for a one night stand
Before you kiss me you should know
Papa was a rodeo

And now it’s 55 years later
We’ve had the romance of the century
After all these years wrestling gators
I still feel like crying when I think of what you said to me

Papa was a rodeo - Mama was a rock’n’roll band
I could play guitar and rope a steer before I learned to stand
Home was anywhere with diesel gas - Love was a trucker’s hand
Never stuck around long enough for a one night stand
Before you kiss me you should know
Papa was a rodeo

Before you kiss me you should know - Papa was a rodeo
What a coincidence, your Papa was a rodeo too

Papa Was a Rodeo

This is what it looks like in December here,

It’s been that kind of night.

A Thanksgiving Message from Carl Siciliano

The holiday season frightens me. It is the time of year our homeless kids are most likely to attempt suicide. Kids who have been cast out of their homes suffer badly during a season that celebrates and idealizes family togetherness.

Yesterday I met with a group of kids at our drop-in center in Chelsea. They were all out in the cold at night, waiting for beds to open up in our shelters. One boy, who is 16 years old, told me how everything went bad for him when he was eleven. His father demanded to know if he was gay and when the boy was honest, his father refused to speak to him for three years. His mother tells him that he is a mistake and that she wishes she never had him. He has been running away repeatedly since then. There is nothing to celebrate at his home. I had a hard time sleeping last night, wondering what he had suffered.

What a sick, toxic force homophobia is in our society, destroying homes, making parents turn on their own children. Tens of thousands of teens in our country have been forced out of their homes. An LGBT teen is eight times more likely to suffer homelessness than a straight teen. The religious and political leaders who promote homophobia are causing terrible human suffering. They lie when they say they are promoting family values.

— via The Stranger

Waiting for the Man, but instead of heroin, he has a metro bus / on Instagram http://instagr.am/p/VqSqK/

Me: I can finally download Star Wars, I'm gonna be a Jedi
Me: You can be my Padme
U: But doesn't that mean you turn to the Dark Side and I die in the end?
Me: Yeah, but until then it's romantic!

Stammtisch / on Instagram http://instagr.am/p/SlnRS/